English: The Communication, Context and Relationship Aspect of a Date (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
A friend told me that doing too much for a guy, his laundry, cooking, shopping, especially in a new relationship, can turn a guy off. She said the more he does for himself makes him feel better. Do you agree?
The answer to this question all too pends on where you're at in the relationship. Here is several answers with different scenarios and views. Hope this helps you to make the right choice.
Good Question With Good Answer
I am going to say it 'depends' on what "doing" is...If "doing" is sex--NO. If "doing" is ironing underwear--YES. But, understand this; providing comfort is not a problem when it is reciprocated or when he is "doing" for you. Many times insecurities makes 'givers' feel like they are doing too much, but if giving provides pleasure; by all means...GIVE! I am married to a woman who gives and let me say it turns me on. But, if I was dating, and a girl offered to pick up my dry cleaning before she even knew my last name I'd run...so like I said...it depends. Hope this helped.
If you are just dating, I think it can be a turn off to a guy. If you are married or in a truly committed relationship it might be positive, but if you aren't, it just turns him off, especially if he is a commitment runner which if he is, might be best to turn him off anyway. That way you don't wait around. Depends what your goals are. If you think doing things for him will win him over to a commitment, it probably won't work.
Year of Commitment
Totally depends on how long you have been together. After a year I'd say you are in the clear to do more. But in the first year of a committed relationship if you do chores for him he'll see you as his mom, not his girlfriend and therefore you lose appeal.
- You want to keep a man do 3 things:
- Rock star sex.
- Cook well.
- Stroke his ego.
A Mans Answer to the Question
You need to know that everybody has got the way they behave. Like me if I had a girl that can give me her best I will be the happiest man in the world. That will make me believe that somebody is there for me that will also multiply my love.
How a Man See's This Question
Well for me I don't think doing the basic things you've stated in your question can put a guy off in fact it can make him love you the more just for that alone but my concern is to know when to draw the line because guys can be funny at times and the seemly little things you think you are doing to please him can be used against you later on.
Also, don't give yourself cheaply to a guy because guys like "competition" in the sense that they want to feel they are fighting for their love but if you are just presenting it on a platter of cheap stock then he's going to see you as a weak & desperate person and that could make him cheat on you.
So watch it sis and make sure he genuinely appreciate everything you are doing for him or else he could just be using you.